So you may say that I am over due for a post. Well, I am. I have recently heard that I have some strangers reading my blog, if that is you, leave me a comment. I would love to know what you think and say hello to you.
This is my first time fulfilling a promise to all of my readers. I promised to write more upon my post about people and their role in your life, you know the one about the house and Christ as the perfect foundation. Yea that one, its my favorite.
Speaking of favorites, Green is my favorite color, Reese’s Peanut Butter cups are my favorite candies, C.S. Lewis is my favorite author, Eastern University is my favorite college and the NY Jets are my favorite football team.
Now I have a question to pose, am I allowed to have favorite people? Just in general, within my friendships and relationships is it fair for me to pick favorites.
To be honest, I am not sure interpersonal relationships can be simplified to having favorites, it is a lot more complicated than that. Sure I can pick and choose several individuals who just seem cooler, nicer, sweeter, or more attractive and label them as my favorite. Like strolling through a grocery aisle and looking for dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets. Those nuggets are by far much cooler and more attractive than the bag of WOW Potato Chips sitting only a few aisles over. (For those who are unaware WOW chips have a nasty tendency of giving the consumer a horrifying case of diarrhea).
For this post I am going to mostly focus on the idea of “Best Friends” as cliche as that may sound it is hard to deny that there are certain people whom you just know that through some bond or deeper connection they are the ones who you depend on, the ones in which it is okay to expect things from , the ones where stories and comments are made in confidence. There is no way to avoid the simple fact that that there are several people who know me better than others, I have gone deeper with them, I have exploited my flaws openly to them. In return they have supported me, they have lifted me up (and quite literally), they have shared themselves with me. It is a level of closeness and sense of comfort that stands out as a place for mutual respect and love.
If you are Christian and claim Christ as your Savior, you should be aware that you are called to love others. Love, love, love them. Even when they annoy you to a point where you believe that a your high five would be better placed if it came across the other person’s cheek. I often say to those struggling with loving others that they just have to love them not actually like them. That may be extremely cynical advice but I am unaware of a better way to handle a situation as such. So for those we do not call our “Best Friends” let them feel loved to, no matter who you are or where you are in life, love others…just do it. Chances are that you aren’t the only one being annoyed by them but, will you take a stand and be the one to show them love in return?
Okay, I digress. Back to Best Friends and what that means. I have been known to create complex metaphors to describe how you should treat people and the role that you should let them play in your life. Go back a few posts and read what I said about letting people be everything except your foundation.
Now you are yelling at me, “MATT!! your brilliance is just extraordinary so do please enlighten us… tell us what should people be doing for us?”
My answer is going to be as Christian as they come. We are supposed to be in Community with each other… so share things. Share yourself. Let others share their lives with you. Do not put up barriers and guards. Why would you do that? You are loved. Why are you hiding? Trust. It hurts so bad… so very bad is the aching sting of broken trust. But how sweet it is to forgive and be forgiven. It is more quenching and satisfying than the most perfectly ripen watermelon on the one day of the year where the heat is so brutal that death and the idea of a moist, cool and dark grave is comforting.
Relationships should not distract you from Christ. No, not ever. Christ should be embodied in that Community. Have you ever been in a mansion before? Well I am lucky enough to have a Contractor as a Father so I grew up watching mansions be built, from their roughest of forms where only the foundation exists to pristine finished products with the most expensive of art hanging from their walls. It is spectacular that if you were to compare the two forms of a mansion they would be unrecognizable as the same building. By saying this I want you to understand that If Christ is that foundation, the adornments in your house WILL reflect Him. You should be able to learn about Christ and see Him in those people that you are surrounding yourself with.
Do not be afraid to be open and honest with those you call your “Best Friends”. It is a true and special bond. It is mutual. There are distinct signs to prove legitimacy. Do not take for granted the time one offers another person. Words and touch should not be your only affirmation. You need to take confidence in yourself as to take confidence in your relationships. Be real. As real as possible. Lean on friends and let Christ work through them.
Wow…out of consideration for my readers I am ending this post. I will pick up again soon. There is much more I have to say about all of this. There is so much to consider about love, depth, confrontation and multitudes of other aspects of relationships. Ponder those ideas for now. Take into consideration your own relationships. Until the next post…